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The Seinfeld Conference Week 6: “The Secret Code”

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By Corey Stewart
SouthernPigskin.com
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Finally in Week 6 it was an all-league weekend with four head to head SoCon contests.

Finally in Week 6 it was an all-league weekend with four head to head SoCon contests. At the midpoint of the season we are starting to get a clearer picture of who is going to be vying for a conference title come November 21st. But youxe2x80x99re going need to take out some cash to make those travel arrangements. Perhaps a quick stop by the ATM on your way out of town?

1) Chattanooga (Jerry Seinfeld) xe2x80x93 Anyone remember Jerryxe2x80x99s secret ATM code? Itxe2x80x99s xe2x80x9cJor-Lxe2x80x9d, Supermanxe2x80x99s father. After this weekend, teams playing Chattanooga should pack some kryptonite because the Mocxe2x80x99s sent a message to the rest of the league this weekend with their shellacking of Furman 31-3. Outside of the first few drives of the game this one was never in doubt. RB Derrick Craine counted for 138 yards of the Mocs 254 total rushing yards, along with 3 TDxe2x80x99s. On Defense, the Mocxe2x80x99s stifled the Paladins for a pedestrian 235 yards of total offense, and even put points on the board with a pick 6 by Lucas Webb in the first half. The Mocxe2x80x99s seem to have their foot firmly applied to the gas pedal this season; hopefully it doesnxe2x80x99t fall asleep on them while they cruise up to Lexington this weekend for 1:30pm tilt with VMI.0

2) Samford (J.Peterman) xe2x80x93 In this episode we learned J.Petermans real name is xe2x80x9cJacopoxe2x80x9d and that he grew up in Costa Rica. Is that where Michael Eubank has been hiding the past few weeks? Wherever he was, Eubank emerged this week in Virginia in route to SoCon Offensive Player of the Week honors with 337 yards passing and 3 TDxe2x80x99s in the Bulldogs victory over VMI 49-13. In total, the Bulldogs offense racked up 511 yards of total offense and held the Keydets to 290 yards as they pulled away in the 4th quarter to seal the victory. The Bulldogs essentially have to run the table the rest of the season to ensure a shot at the SoCon title, but if the offense can continue to dominate, and Chattanooga and Citadel keep it up,0 itxe2x80x99s safe to tell the maitre’d itxe2x80x99ll just be the xe2x80x9cThree Bullsxe2x80x9d for dinner come the end of the season. The first course gets served this Saturday as Samford hosts resurgent Citadel at 3:00.

3) Citadel (Kramer) xe2x80x93 Hold on tight Bulldog fans, itxe2x80x99s going to be a wild ride to seasons end. The fire alarms were sounding two weeks ago after the Bulldogs third straight loss to the Charleston Southern Buccaneers sent them limping into their bye week. But the time off was well spent as the Bulldogs found their groove in route to a 39-12 win over Wofford. Offensively, the Bulldogs controlled the game with 396 total yards of offense (271 on the ground) on their way to a commanding 28-6 lead midway through the 3rd quarter. While the offense was cranking out yards on the ground, the defense, led by SoCon Defensive Player of the Week Tevin Floyd held Woffordxe2x80x99s vaunted rushing attack to 124 yards xe2x80x93 165 below their season average. If a firetruck ends up driving into Birmingham this weekend for the 3:00 contest with Samford, donxe2x80x99t worryxe2x806Cosmoxe2x80x99s got the caboose!

4) Western Carolina (Elaine) xe2x80x93 Ever been on a date with someone when you wake up and realize xe2x80x9cWhat am I doing? I’m on a date with this guy because he didn’t remember me? He’s demented, listen to him…xe2x80x9d Yep xe2x80x93 that was Western this weekend. The Mercer Bears came to Cullowhee and the sleep walking Catamounts almost let them ruin their weekend, if not for an amazing come from behind win orchestrated by a backup QB and last second missed field goal 24-21. Scoring the final 21 points of the game, the Catamounts needed a last minute 91 yard drive, helmed by back up QB Wes Holcombe, and capped by RB Detrez Newsomexe2x80x99s 22 yard 4th down TD run for the final points of the game. The Catamounts were outgained 404-338 by the Bears, but were able to pull out the victory and keep their title hopes alive by keeping the Bears scoreless the entire second half. The Catamounts remain on the outside looking in of the top 3 for now, but have their chance to move up this Saturday as Samford hosts Citadel and the Catamounts visit Wofford at 2:00.

5) Furman (George) xe2x80x93 No cash withdrawals for the Paladins in the near future, as their code has been compromised. In a battle with Chattanooga this weekend Furman left their 3 game winning streak mojo on the bus, and were subsequently ushered out of Chattanooga with a 31-3 beating at the hands of the Mocxe2x80x99s. Outside of the first 2 drives of the game, the Paladins were never in this one, and have mostly their anemic offense to blame. QB Reece Hannon was 19-34 for 176 yards and 2 INTxe2x80x99s xe2x80x93 one of which was returned for a TD midway through the second quarter to essentially put the game out of reach xe2x80x93 and only rushed for 59 yards (2 of which came after the half). At this point in the season, Furman has the 98th ranked offense in the country averaging only 304 yards a game. The Paladins are on a bye this week, and should look into feeding their offense some supplements to get better. Maybe a heaping dose of xe2x80x9cBoscoxe2x80x9d would do the trick?

6) Mercer (Fred) xe2x80x93 Fred was the forgetful character who lived with his mother in Brooklyn that Elaine continued to chase after because he couldnxe2x80x99t remember ever going out with her. After this weekend Mercer kicker Jagger Lieb might want to move out of state and forget most of what he knows after the Bears lost for a second week in a row on the foot of their kicker. In their first SoCon road game of the year, the Bears almost went wire to wire on the Catamounts in a losing effort 24-21 in Cullowhee. The Bears dominated time of possession with 34:28 and had 404 yards of total offense, but gave up the go-ahead score to Western with :42 left on a 22 yard Detrez Newsome run. Despite the time running down, QB John Russ drove the Bears to the Catamounts 25 yard line, but Liebxe2x80x99s 42 yarder sailed wide left for the loss. At 2-3 now (and on a 3 game losing streak) the Bears hope to make some new memories at home this Saturday when they host winless (and future SoCon member) East Tennessee St at 4:00.

7) Wofford (Leapinxe2x80x99 Larry) xe2x80x93 So much promise coming into the season for the 2015 Terriers. But now the store is burning to the ground and the fire department is nowhere in sight. In the 39-12 drubbing by Citadel this weekend, the Terriers were served a heavy dose of their own medicine as the Bulldogs ran rough shot over Woffordxe2x80x99s defense. In all the Terriers had 262 yards of total offense, with 138 of that coming through the air xe2x80x93 never a good sign for a team known for running the football. The Terriers are 1-1 in the conference now and face an all or nothing test this weekend as they host the rising Western Carolina Catamounts at 2:00 in Spartanburg.

8) VMI (Petermanxe2x80x99s Mother) xe2x80x93 The season is on its death bed for the Keydets, and it doesnxe2x80x99t look like they have the personnel to resurrect it. While VMI battled hard on Saturday, and had the game close in the 3rd at 21-13, Samford scored the final 28 points of the game to pull away 49-13 and send the Keydets to 1-5 on the season. Again Al Cobb had an off day for VMI, going 19-35 for 183 yards, along with 4 costly INTxe2x80x99s. While strides have been made to be more competitive in 2015, the Keydets simply lack the depth to compete consistently in the SoCon. The battle doesnxe2x80x99t get any easier this weekend as they host Chattanooga at 1:30.

Corey Stewart – Corey grew up in Atlanta and attended Furman University, where he played center on the football team from 2002 to 2005. He was a three-time All-SoCon selection, was honored as an All-American in 2005 and also received the prestigious Robert B. King Award from Furman. Since graduating, he has experience as a sideline reporter for the Furman Sports Network from 2006 to 2010, while serving as the Paladinsxe2x80x99 color commentator since 2011.


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